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This section is open to anyone who has questions or wants information on adoption. The only thing we require is that all questions and comments be respectful of parents who've adopted.

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Unread postPosted: Tue Dec 04, 2012 10:13 pm 
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Site Admin
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Joined: Tue Jan 29, 2008 5:31 pm
Posts: 2915
Location: Florida by way of Brooklyn.
Your Adoption Connection: Adopted three siblings in 2003.
I haven't been around much lately - and I apologize. Linny does a great job of holding down the fort and I promise to be around more. As I said in my email, Forever Parents is going to celebrate TEN years in a couple of weeks! I'd love to hear from all of you and see what's going on in your adoption journey and other areas of your lives. :pink

_________________
Mom To Three
~ Cimion
~ Shawna
~ Jacqueline
Siblings Adopted in 2003


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Unread postPosted: Tue Dec 04, 2012 10:43 pm 
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I'm New!

Joined: Tue Mar 16, 2010 4:28 pm
Posts: 24
Location: Florida
Your Adoption Connection: We are waiting to finalize from Russia.
Hi Joanne...I don't even remember the last time I was on here. This was such a great bridge to help me get thru the months of waiting to meet our daughter and then until we brought her home May 2010. As much as I couldn't wait for "it" to be over and for us to be free of paperwork & at the mercy of our agency & Russia...our finalization trip for Z was also our 1st trip for J! We are all home together safe & sound and 12/17/12 we will celebrate our arrival to the US with our youngest. A few months ago our oldest son (23) moved back home too so now we are busting at the seems again :) Family life is the greatest!!!


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Unread postPosted: Wed Dec 05, 2012 9:13 pm 
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Member

Joined: Wed Aug 31, 2011 8:14 pm
Posts: 48
Location: Forest City, NC
Your Adoption Connection: Pursuing adoption from NC foster care
I'm still waiting to find out when my agency (the local DSS) will start MAPP classes again -- I started in Sept., but the class got cancelled due to low turnout and they said they will plan a class to start in January, but no word yet on the start date. My references did already receive their questionnaires (or reference request letter -- I don't know what the format was), so I guess that's a good sign.

In the meantime, I have decided that I am 100% sure I only want to be licensed to adopt, not to foster (here in NC they are two separate licenses, but can be pursued concurrently with just one home study). One of my coworkers has friends and a family member who work for DSS, and she has shared a few stories of cases. I also work with mentally ill adults from this county, and some of my clients have children in foster care. Between those two sources, I have heard enough stories to know that I don't want to do foster care.

I still check the state photolisting regularly, and it's reassuring that they frequently update and new listings are added all the time. Most of the kids are at the high end of my age range (up to 12), but there was just a 4-year-old boy listed who I'll keep my eye on if he stays listed for for the next few months. The profile lists him as having "severe" physical/medical needs, but it's not obvious what those are, so depending what it is he may or may not stay on the list for very long (there are a couple other medically-needed younger kids who have been listed for a while, but their profiles specify two-parent families only and/or homes with other kids).

In any case, I know that there are kids available who match my criteria, and I know that I will be matched with the kid I am meant to have.

Heather -- anxious to get my home study done so I can start submitting inquiries, but it will be at least a few more months before I get to that point

_________________
Heather


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Unread postPosted: Wed Dec 05, 2012 9:28 pm 
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Member

Joined: Mon Mar 26, 2012 5:04 pm
Posts: 27
Your Adoption Connection: We are hoping to adopt through foster care.
We started the foster to adopt process in April. Did our classes, paperwork and homestudy in May and had a little one in June. She is absolutely adorable but younger than we thought. I think we were planning on a sibling set in the 3-6 year old range. We have 4 kiddos already 7-14 and thought we'd open our home to someone or ones younger than our youngest. When the call came for a 1 year old, we were excited but shocked. Back to diapers and naptimes. Even though my youngest two are 7, I totally forgot the baby stage. Six months in and it has come back to me! But working with the system has been eye-opening. I wish I had a crystal ball to know how it would all turn out. We're totally attached and are having all kinds of paradoxical feelings. As a Christian I want to believe that every situation can be redeemed/transformed and I would love to be able to pray that for her parents with an undivided heart. And have been for months, but the longer the process goes on, the more I find myself hoping that she'll be with us forever. Is that bad? I so don't want to feel that I'm stealing someone's child. Prayers and advice appreciated.


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Unread postPosted: Thu Dec 06, 2012 8:49 am 
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Homeschooling Mama
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Joined: Sun Feb 10, 2008 3:21 pm
Posts: 987
Location: Hagerstown, Maryland
Your Adoption Connection: I have 3 children, all adopted as older kids.
We are looking to start the process again for a sibling group, but not til next year. I am going to call after the holidays to see what the process is in Maryland, since my other 3 kiddos came home from NY when we were living there. My husband wants a sibling group of 3, but we will probably compromise on 2 because I don't know if I can handle that many special needs all at once. I am really busy most days already.

Jessica seems to be doing great. She's had some emotional ups and downs, but she works full time for the military, has 5 figures socked away in the bank and owns her car outright. She took a break from college since she got orders for Kuwait for Fall 2013. Initially she had orders for this January for Afghanistan, but that filled with volunteers, so she didn't have to go. I was pretty relieved. That said, she's let me know that she probably won't be able to pass on Kuwait. I saw her last weekend, and she came here for Thanksgiving, but she can't get the time off for Christmas, so I am depressed about that. I don't know when I will be able to see her again, since she is in western NY. Miss my Jessabug like crazy!

Brandon is making progress. He's still living at home and struggling with both depression and anxiety. I really like his therapist, and he seems to be helping. Brandon just finished his first online college class (Intro to Information Technology), and though we haven't received the final grade, we're fairly confident it is going to be an A. He will enroll again for the Spring semester, but we can't until after the 1st, since he needs to be able to pay for the class. :) He hasn't made any friends in Maryland yet, though he has been going to bar trivia and playing on the same team as my husband every Wednesday night, with 3 other people. So, he gets out and enjoys it lots. We had a meeting with his therapist yesterday and he wants to get a part time job next year, so we are signing up with an employment program for people with disabilities.

Carolina has her own ups and downs and I struggle with knowing what to do with my hormonal, red-haired handful on most days. I am still homeschooling, and she is excelling with her mostly 9th grade curriculum. Her best subjects are Algebra and Biology (she loves dissections) and she is very vocal about her goal of going to college. That said, she wants to study engineering, and I am uncertain of her ability to hack such a rigorous major. We'll see, I guess. Cara still struggles with shyness, anxiety and being a teenager. She has had the same boyfriend for almost 4 months.

Image

_________________
Holly (35)
Waiting to adopt #4 (& maybe #5!)

Proud mom to:
Brandon (24), adopted at age 12
Jessica (23), adopted at age 10
Carolina (16), adopted at age 11


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Unread postPosted: Thu Dec 06, 2012 10:51 am 
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Site Admin
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 29, 2008 5:31 pm
Posts: 2915
Location: Florida by way of Brooklyn.
Your Adoption Connection: Adopted three siblings in 2003.
Holy - can you make that photo smaller - it's stretching the screen out. Thanks.

_________________
Mom To Three
~ Cimion
~ Shawna
~ Jacqueline
Siblings Adopted in 2003


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Unread postPosted: Thu Dec 06, 2012 3:06 pm 
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Site Admin
User avatar

Joined: Fri Feb 08, 2008 2:23 am
Posts: 5347
Location: Farm fields of Illinois
Your Adoption Connection: International, foster and private adoption.
Ohh Holly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That photo is great---I mean, GREAT! I try to stay away from comments about how adopted kids resemble their parents.........but I'm going to say anyway that I think your babies DO LOOK just like the both of you!!!!!!!!!!! It's astounding! They're just beautiful!

Know how you feel about Jessica going into the hot zone. My oldest was in Iraq two times and it didn't get any easier, that's for sure. And not knowing when you're going to see them again-----(sigh), I get that too--remember it well.

I'm so glad to hear the kids are doing well....you've helped them so much... :hug2

Sincerely,

Linny

_________________
There is an instinct in a woman to love most her own child - and an instinct to make any child who needs her love, her own. ~Robert Brault

Adoption Specialist for
Adopt America Network


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Unread postPosted: Thu Dec 06, 2012 9:23 pm 
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Honorary Member

Joined: Thu Dec 29, 2011 7:47 pm
Posts: 290
Location: Wisconsin
Your Adoption Connection: DS adopted in 2007, hoping to adopt again!
My update....Eli is 5 and doing great in kindergarten. He is reading above expectations and was called the best little artist they have seen for a while! ( :pink Proud Momma!)

Toby is now almost 11 months and walking, talking, & into everything and it all goes in his mouth! He is a joyful baby and is a delight! We waited for him through all the ups and subsequent downs of our journey and there is no doubt that he completes our family! When others ask if we will adopt again DH and I both respond, NO. Our hearts are content and do not want to return the uncertainty and heartache an adoption journey can have. That said, if I open the front door and a baby was lying in a basket.... :wink

So all in all we are living our happily ever after. The days are hectic and my dishes seem not done more than they are done, but I will never get these years back. I am living each of moment and loving the blessings I have found in my children. :love

_________________
June 2006- Started adoption process
April 2007- DS was born- Never knew so much love!
December 2007- DS adoption finalized

Two failed placements and a lot of ups and downs in our second adoption journey.
January 2012- DS was born- A completely wonderful surprise!
July- DS adoption finalized


Always remember there is nothing worth sharing like the love that let us share our name...


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Unread postPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2012 6:54 pm 
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Homeschooling Mama
User avatar

Joined: Sun Feb 10, 2008 3:21 pm
Posts: 987
Location: Hagerstown, Maryland
Your Adoption Connection: I have 3 children, all adopted as older kids.
Sure thing Joanne! :grin Sorry about that!

_________________
Holly (35)
Waiting to adopt #4 (& maybe #5!)

Proud mom to:
Brandon (24), adopted at age 12
Jessica (23), adopted at age 10
Carolina (16), adopted at age 11


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Unread postPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2012 9:57 pm 
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Site Admin
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 29, 2008 5:31 pm
Posts: 2915
Location: Florida by way of Brooklyn.
Your Adoption Connection: Adopted three siblings in 2003.
No problem Holly - much better now. Thanks!! :green

_________________
Mom To Three
~ Cimion
~ Shawna
~ Jacqueline
Siblings Adopted in 2003


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